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Striking Roomate
#11
I like the story, though some of the writing needs to be edited. The sexual content is fine. I think you should simply keep writing and writing what interests you, learning as you go. Some of the particular fetish content on the board is not to my taste, some of it is, but we learn who we like as writers or artists and can follow them because I think the board is big enough to cover all that. Keep writing & I'll follow your stuff.
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#12
I like the uniqueness of your writing. While back stabbing is not the norm here, it is a interesting change. Also, your phrases are different than what we normally see here which makes the whole piece refreshingly different. I think some of the action could have been tightened up a little more with slightly less commentary, but over-all this is different, unique and enjoyable. I strongly urge you to continue also - I think your concepts are excellent.
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