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Opening
The iron gate rose with a screech, and the smell of rust mixed with dust filled my lungs. My bare feet touched the scorching sand—the midday sun had baked the top layer like freshly fired pottery shards. Across the arena, behind the opposite grille, the black man was scraping dead skin off his heel with his gladius, as casual as if he were picking his teeth in his own yard. I noticed a pale old scar on his left shin; the healed skin there was smoother than the rest, and I knew that muscle beneath had once been badly torn. My brother shouted my name from the stands, but his voice was shredded by the trumpet blasts.
Probing
In the first exchange, he advanced with his scutum raised, bronze shavings drifting in the sunlight from the worn rim. I deliberately showed weakness, pulling my right foot back and dragging a shallow furrow in the sand. He took the bait and swung his sword at my knee, but I jumped early—the blade grazed my sole, throwing off a string of sparks. As I landed, I threw my left fist straight at his face. He dodged, and my knuckles scraped across his cheekbone. In that instant, I felt the thin film of sweat on his skin; it was like oiled drumhide.
Grappling
We locked together, and he shoved me against a wooden post. His chest pressed against mine, and I could count the beads of sweat in his collarbone hollow. His chin ground into my skull, and I heard a faint crack from my cervical vertebrae. I tried to knee him in the groin, but his thigh muscles clamped down—they were hard as dried beef, and they squeezed my kneecap until it ached. He lowered his head and smashed his forehead into my nose. Blood gushed instantly, hot and salty, running into my mouth. While his head was still up, I stabbed my dagger into his right ribs, but it slid only half an inch before catching on bone. He grunted, grabbed my wrist with his left hand, and wrenched the dagger out. The blood that spattered from the wound was warm and carried his skin temperature.
The Trap
Suddenly he stepped back three paces, pressing his left hand over his rib wound, deliberately letting blood seep between his fingers. I thought it was my chance and charged after him. He stumbled—his ankle dragged on the sand—and I lunged. In that split second, I saw a glint in his eyes. Too late. He dropped to the ground, swept his right leg across my ankles, and I lost balance, falling on top of him. His right arm came from below, circling my neck like an iron band, while his left hand drove the gladius straight up into my abdomen—dead center through the navel.
The Instant of Penetration
The moment the point touched my skin, I heard a faint hiss, like a snake's tongue. Then the blade sliced through muscle, and I could feel the viscous drag as it passed through the fat layer. Next it hit the rectus sheath, paused briefly, then punched through with a wet pop into the abdominal cavity. There was no pain at first—only a swollen sensation, as if a cold iron rod had been stuffed inside me. My feet left the ground—literally lifted by the strength of his arm, my toes dangling about a hand's breadth above the sand. I looked down and saw the blade buried in my belly button, only the guard remaining outside, blood trickling along the blade like red tadpoles.
Suspended Moment
For those few seconds I hung in the air, I noticed an old man in a purple-bordered toga tossing rose petals from the front row; one crimson petal drifted down and stuck to the bleeding edge of my navel. I heard my brother's hysterical shouts, but the words were muffled, as if through water. I could feel the blade quivering inside me—the tremor transmitted from the muscles of his arm. My stomach was crushed against the point, and bile surged up my esophagus, making me cough violently. Each cough twisted the blade slightly inside the wound, like a finger scraping my liver.
The Withdrawal
He yanked the sword out with a jerk, and it felt like a hot, slithering serpent being pulled from my body. The wound, now unplugged, let everything inside rush out. I crashed to my knees first—the kneecaps thudded dully against the sand—then I toppled sideways. Instinctively I clamped my hand over my navel, but instead of smooth skin, I felt slippery, warm, writhing matter—my intestines were sliding out through the gap, like squeezed meat from a casing. I looked down and saw dark-red loops of bowel spilling between my fingers, dotted with tiny yellow globules of fat, still twitching faintly.
After Falling
I lay on my side, curling my knees toward my chest—a reflexive protective posture. But more intestine kept coming, some sections dragging on the sand. Grains of sand stuck to the slick walls, and the friction sent sharp pains deep inside me. My right fingers clawed into the dirt, driving sand under my nails; one nail peeled back, and blood oozed from the nail bed. My bladder had burst inside the cavity, and a mix of urine and blood leaked from the wound's edge, soaking the skin of my groin—cold and wet.
Physical Reactions
I began to convulse violently, my feet kicking against the sand, digging the pit deeper with each spasm. Every seizure tugged at the abdominal muscles, pushing more bowel out, and one loop still held crumbs of last night's bread, glued in a slurry of digestive juices. My throat made a guttural heh-heh sound—the reflex of my windpipe irritated by regurgitated stomach acid. My genitals contracted from neural reflexes, and semen leaked uncontrollably, forming a cloudy translucent patch in the pool of blood.
Fading Senses
The full agony finally hit—like red-hot wire mesh being twisted inside my gut. I curled tighter, no longer clutching the wound but raking the sand with both hands, the sharp scratch of grains against my fingertips piercingly clear. The crowd's noise grew distant, as if coming from the mouth of a cave. Dimly I saw the black man crouch beside me; he tapped my cheek with the flat of his blade—still cool, coated with my blood. He said something—I caught words like liver and rope. I tried to curse back, but only bloody froth, mixed with shredded spittle, bubbled from my mouth.
Final Moments
The edges of my vision grayed out, closing in from the periphery. I saw my brother vault over the railing, but guards stopped him. My right leg suddenly kicked out once, hard, flinging a clump of sand, then stiffened. I felt that most of my intestine was already outside, and the part dragging on the ground was growing cold. A fly landed on my left eyeball, and I lacked even the strength to blink. The last sense to go was hearing—I listened to my heartbeat slow, like a leaky drum, until it fell silent. Darkness washed over me like tepid water, and my final scrap of awareness was the persistent dull ache at my navel wound, but that too was diluting, like ink fading in water, gradually thinning away.
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